| February
1st of February
1879 Milk bottles
were first introduced by Echo Farms Limited in New York -
"I've got this strange 'bottled
up' feeling as I stand here before
you... maybe it's because on
this day etc".
2nd of February
2300 BC The earliest
known reservoir was constructed in Egypt - "As you've probably
observed I've been drinking water
all night... maybe it's because
on this day etc."
3rd of February
1966 Russian Luna
9 landed on the Moon - "Today is a great
day for mankind... not because
I'm speaking but... because on
this day etc."
4th of February
1926 Michael Campbell
broke the world land speed record - "If you find that I'm
covering the ground rather
fast in my speech... maybe it's
because on this day etc."
5th of February
1870 Minute hands
appeared on watches for the first time - "At first I felt
offended when I saw you all looking
at your watches when I stood
up but then I remembered that... on
this day etc."
6th of February
1820 The first
submarine was tested in London - "I have this deep
deep feeling today ... maybe
it's because on this day etc."
7th of February
1964 The Beatles
arrived in the US and took the country by storm - "All I can
say to you is 'HELP!'
... maybe it's because on this
day etc."
8th of February
1928 Sir Alexander
Flemming discovered penicillin - "Now there was no need for
the chairman to give me a quick
jab to get me on my feet... because
today is etc"
9th of February
1942 Today is the
day the famous racehorse Shergar disappeared - "As I stand
here before you I can't help hoping that I could quietly
disappear and I'm reminded that...
on this day etc."
10th of
February
1942 Glen Miller
was presented with the first-ever gold disk for Chattanooga
Choo Choo - "Achoo Achoo,
no I'm not clearing my throat I'd just like to draw your attention
that... on this day etc."
11th of
February
1990 Nelson Mandela
was freed after 26 years' imprisonment - "Consider yourself
lucky that you only have to stay put and listen to me speaking
to you for 26 seconds...
do you know that on this day
etc."
12th of
February
1777 The World's
first Iron Bridge was built today in the UK - "To be honest
I feel like running away and drowning myself but then I managed
to steel
myself... maybe it's because
on this day etc."
13th of
February
1848 Today the
first pneumatic tyre was patented by Scottish engineer Robert
Thompson - "Forgive me if I talk hot
air to you today...
it's because on this day etc
14th of
February
AD 808 Gunpowder
was first described in China... I feel like I'm exploding
... maybe it's because on this
day etc."
15th of
February
1848 The planet
Neptune was discovered by Johann Gottfried Galle - "Tonight
I have this odd spaced-out
feeling... maybe it's because
on this day etc."
16th of
February
1947 - Chuck Yeager
became the first person to fly faster than the speed of sound
- "Here is my speech ladies and gentlemen... Rrrrrrrrrrr!
... as you probably noticed I've
given it to you almost faster
than the speed of sound ... that's
because on this day etc."
17th of
February
1863 The Red Cross
was founded today - "All I can see is red
(Or... forgive my red
face) ... maybe it's because
on this day etc."
18th of
February
1797 Top Hats were
introduced in London by haberdasher John Hetherington - "Today
is a very good day for talking
through your hat... because
on this day etc."
19th of
February
1847 Sir James
Simpson discovered the anaesthetic properties of chloroform
- "Today, ladies and gentlemen I am reminded that Sir James
Simpson discovered a far more painless way of putting
everybody to sleep ... because
on this day etc."
20th of
February
AD 105 Paper was
invented by the Chinese - 'If you find my speech is rather
long, don't blame me, blame the Chinese for all these notes
of mine... because on this day
etc.'
21st of
February
1762 The Sandwich
was invented by the Earl of Sandwich's cook - 'Frankly I feel
like a sandwich, stuck here between two old crusts who are
making sure that I don't run away... maybe
it's because on this day etc.'
22nd of
February
2000 WAP (wireless
application protocol) mobile phones link up to the internet
- 'Pardon me while I use my mobile
phone to link up to the little
speech that I have prepared for you... do
you know that on this day etc.'
23rd of
February
1836 The siege
of The Alamo began - 'Today was not a good day Davy
Crokett and I see absolutely
no reason why it should be a good day for me either ... do
you know that on this day etc.'
24th of
February
1940 Soccer legend
Denis Law was born - 'Now I'm not going to lay down the Law
today, that was put down very successfully back in 1940...
because on this day etc.'
25th of
February
1848 Karl Marx
and Friedrich Engels prepared the Communist Manifesto - 'I
had planed to give you a little manifesto today, but I found
that my cards were already 'Markx'd'... because
on this day etc.'
26th of
February
1815 Napoleon escaped
from Elba - 'Better men than me have escaped
from tighter corners than this today... because
on this day etc.'
27th of
February
Alpinist Edward
Whymper was first to scale the Matterhorn - 'You are not going
to hear a whimper
out of me today as I face this mountainous
task... maybe it's because on
this day etc.'
28th of
February
1912 Albert Perey
became the first person to parachute from a plane - 'I want
you all to look up in the air while I jump
off the stage and run... because
on this day etc.'
29th of
February
Leap Year Day -
'Forgive me if I jump
right in to what I want to say ... because
today is etc.'
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